Autosexual person feels sexual attraction primarily toward themselves. Someone who is autosexual experiences little to no sexual attraction toward other people. Many people feel it falls under the asexual umbrella, the sexual spectrum, or ace spec. Although this is a relatively uncommon term, many people identify as autosexual.
Spectrums and comparisons
Sexual orientation is the main form of sexual attraction people experience. It is a spectrum and the way people experience attraction varies for each individual. Forms of attraction or desire may fall into many different categories, including sexual, physical romantic, and emotional. They can also be different for everyone.
Signs that you could be autosexual:
You prefer masturbation to sex.
While you might not say no to sex with another person, you know that your strongest orgasms and deepest satisfaction come from sessions. “If you find yourself drawn to masturbation and the arousal to your own is much more intense than the simulation that comes from partnered activities, you might be autosexual, “says Lori Lawrenz Psy.D. A clinical psychologist specializing in sexuality.
You use fantasies about yourself when having sex to orgasm.
When you invite another person or people into bed with you, you’re not able to get intensely turned on or reach orgasm without seeing yourself in your mind’s eye.
You fantasize about yourself when you’re masturbation instead of watching porn.
The starting role in your masturbatory fantasies is always given to yourself. You might focus on thoughts of your body, your scent, or your mind. Gayle says a person who is “sexually attracted to themselves in sexual fantasies or only aroused in such fantasies” might want to consider that they could be autosexual.
You prioritize masturbation and quality time with yourself over the pursuit of dates.
Even when presented with the opportunity to go out with someone else, you find yourself more enticed by the idea of a night in with yourself in the bath or wrapped up in your sheets.
You have erotic dreams about yourself.
We often show up in our sex dreams it’s most common that at least one other person is present. If you have persistent erotic dreams that feather only yourself, this could be an indicator that you are autosexual.
You love having sex in front of a mirror.
During partnered sexual contact, if you have a mirror close by, and your gaze focuses on your own body, and these images evoke arousal (as opposed to the naked body of your partner), then consider autosexual orientation as a possibility.
Autosexual vs. autoromantic
A person who is autoromantic has a romantic attraction to themselves. People who are autosexual may also be autoromantic, be autosexual but not autoromantic, or vice versa. People can experience romantic attraction in a different way than sexual attraction. Romantic attraction is a desire for a romantic relationship or romantic intimacy, such as going on dates.
A person who is autoromantic may consider their relationship with themselves to be romantic. This may involve feeling and receiving romantic love for oneself, going on dates by oneself, and taking care of oneself.
Autosexuality vs. narcissism
Autosexuality is the way a person experiences sexual attraction, whereas narcissism is a personality disorder. People with narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) may display the following characteristics:
Grandiosity
Need for admiration
Lack of empathy
Aggression
Research suggests NPD may stem from a genetic predisposition for the condition or certain experiences in childhood, such as rejection or excessive praise.
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Sexual frustration
Sexual frustration describes a state of irritation, agitation, or stress resulting from sexual inactivity or dissatisfaction. It is common. Natural feeling, and can affect anyone. Sexual frustration is a natural response that many people experience at one time or another.
When to contact an expert
If a person’s sexual frustration begins to affect other areas of their life, they may consider speaking with an expert. Regardless of their relationship status, a person can consult a sex therapist for their concerns about sex, body image, intimacy, sexual shame, and sexual frustration. These experts can help individuals express their needs and fantasies and reconcile their mismatched sexual drives with sexual partners.
